Quote-Fingers McGee and other People I don't wish to become--oh God, I'm Quote Fingers McGee!!!! Nooooo!

Other pair of quote-fingers doing double-duty of taking the picture.
But, I was still thinking the total gesture in my head, so it totally counts.

Using Quote-Fingers is ADDICTIVE! I tend to use them when it's so painfully obvious in the intonation of my voice (quote-intonation-fingers, if you will) that my quote-fingers are dreadfully redundant. I seem to use Quote-Fingers A LOT these days--they're becoming a crutch. I'm becoming THAT person. I need to wear more pants with pockets so I can put YE WEAPONS OF TRUTH AWAY!!!

I also use a lot of quote-fingers in my writing. I eschew the italics--they're just too grown-up for me. I like the more, in-your-face, ho-ho-ho! of the written quotes. I know it's usually unnecessary. But really, for the most part, so are a majority of my thoughts.

Quote-fingers are just one step away from another overused hand-gesture. No, I'm not speaking of the good ol' finger, but moreover, the finger-gun, used by car-salesmen and smarmy people the world over. It's never effective. Except for the photo below, I've never honestly used that gesture...in fact, I think it's the law that you have to say, "You've got it, Babe," and to also make a tongue clicking noise whilst "firing" your finger-gun. This gesture works best when wearing a bolo tie.


Okay, so I need to quit it with the whole quote-fingers thing and the finger-gun is NOT an option. Unfortunately, my assholeness has not been limited to the errant gesture--Lately, I've been really close to setting off the puke-green alert (similar to the Amber Alert, but mainly for moronic tendencies) with using the following phrase:

"I know, right?"

AFTER WAY TOO MANY THINGS!!!! It always makes me sound WAY more enthusiastic about whatever topic is being discussed. For instance:
Co-Worker: I am so tired.
Me: I know, right???

It's like it's the new "Me, too!"----gag. I make myself gag. Not "gag," but GAG.


I'm pretty sure it would be a catchphrase that DJ Tanner, a la Full House, circa 1980-whatever would use in the midst of a pow wow with Kimmy Gibbler. But for some damn reason, I feel I MUST work this into my lingo of 2008. It comes off as Valley-Girl meets oh, I don't know---ME. Not pretty. Must quit that crap, too.

What about you? What phrase or gesture do you employ that makes you want to give yourself a wedgie?? This can be our little self-help comment-circle. If you see a phrase or gesture listed in the comments, consider yourself warned--you're probably pissing-off/annoying the hell out of at least 5 people per day. Ya know, just FYI, LOVE YOU!